‘No vegans allowed’ by Anonymous

The Vegan..nice girl and literally wouldn’t say boo to a goose (on ethical grounds). So you can imagine the fun I had with her (plus she was 6ft). I was thinking about seeing her again until at the end of night I ordered some tea with honey and she went on about the exploitation of bees….I dropped my head in shame only to find a pair of size 11 shiny leather boots staring back at me. That’s right, she was a dodgy vegan with boats for feet. Not ideal.

So essentially I’m done with dodgy Vegans. I think I need a care-free carnivorous type with sensibly sized flippers.


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